Day 3: June 15, 2008

Last night we went out to the bar in our hotel. The manager was an American black man from Denver so when we said we were from Ohio State it changed the dynamics of the bar and we took it over. He said over the microphone, “We have we students from the Buckeye State!” We hollered. We screamed by ourselves of course because nobody else knew what he was talking about especially the large groups of Chinese and Scottish students.

We requested songs all night and were the only ones dancing except to Scottish girls who decided to teach Desiree the weird twisting Running man type dance.

It was fun though. We got in for free and drank all night for free. I didn’t get drunk, not even tipsy but I woke up with a headache. Maybe from all the yelling.




Today, on our way to another large city, Kumasi, we went to a village called Patrose. There we met the Patrosehene or the King of Patrose. The bus arrived in the rural village and I was the first to exit. An older woman, maybe in her 40s said “Akwaaba” or welcome. I smiled, shook her hand, and then decided to give her a hug which I think surprised her a little, but welcomed the embrace. I continued towards the drum music. I was the first to enter into the king’s court.

Patrose children

Patrosehene entering his court The hene offering a prayer and libations

I’m not sure what came over me but I felt like I was going to cry. It was over-whelming. I was fighting back tears. I was the first, again, to stand up to announce my Akan day name (many Akan speakers have ‘day names’ which are male and female names associated with each day of the week) and I said where I was from in the local language, Twi, and they applauded and cheered so loud the tears just started rolling. I was excited, happy, joyful, moved, and so many other things wrapped up into one plus other feelings I haven’t labeled yet or the English is too young of a language to adequately articulate my emotions.



The Patrosehene then gave libations (prayer), told us history and introduced us to his court. During his speech he tells us that his village is in need of school supplies.



Although the books we collected were for the school in Winneba I was moved to give some boxes to the school. Dr. Rucker and I presented the items to the king and then we all danced in the court with the children and other townspeople. Many of us took pictures with other children and adults who shared our day names. Every time someone shared a name with another, it was always followed by cheers. It was as if there was a competition of how many people were born on the same day of the week. It was exciting. Exciting isn’t a substantial enough word… Exuberating. Fulfilling. Impactful. I loved it. Then the drums played and danced, with the kids,the adults, with everybody.

Here are some more Afia's!!!

Lastly we visited the cocoa farms. I’m not sure what I thought cocoa looked like (I think I envisioned brown wheat-like plants) but it isn’t at all what I thought. It’s a fruit that grows on a tree and the seeds are dried.

The seeds are then grounded and mixed with sugar to make chocolate. I was given the fruit by one of the members of the king’s court and I wasn’t sure if you were supposed to suck off the outside and spit out the seed or swallow it. I felt like the best thing to do was swallow it just to make sure they didn’t think I was spitting out their food. Come to find out you are suppose to spit out the seed but I was ok with being on the safe side.

The REAL Day 2: June 14, 2008

Today, is day two and the hotel is beautiful. I woke up around lots of colors.



I woke up early just so I can take it all in. I went outside to find a gentleman watching me. So I spoke “Maakye” or good morning. He signed that he was deaf explaining why he couldn’t understand me. He signed that I was pretty and I signed “thank-you.”




He asked if I knew sign language and I signed to him “a little” so I decided to try and brush-up on my sign language from high school. It was fun. He said we are going to talk later after my group gets back from the excursion of the day. Dr. Rucker came by and I did my best to translate. I wasn’t too bad. He told Rucker he had gotten fat from the last time the studt abroad group was there. I was proud of myself ha ha. Then Rucker and I left to go to breakfast.

I was looking for something different. Food I can’t get in America. The pancakes were different. Good but different. The syrup wasn’t maple but made from sugar cane. It reminded me of my grandma and the sugar cane my great-grandma grew on her acres in the country. I didn’t like cane syrup growing up but from some reason it tastes better in Ghana.

The Real Day One/Two: June 12th

Running late, Chauncey helped me load the boxes on the bus I ran home, took a shower, got in the bus and we headed to Detroit. It was a good thing we rode to Detroit and didn’t fly because the there was a thunderstorm. I would have been bitter if we missed our flight again.





We stopped in Amsterdam and I bought a few things (a shot glass and some glass Dutch shoes).






I came off the airport not feeling like I was in Ghana. It was as if I was in the Caribbean or something. I thought I would be overcome with joy but it didn’t happen. Could have been the jet lag. But once we entered the airport I had to hold back the tears a little when I saw “Akwaaba” painted on the wall. The airport was hot, but not too hot. I started realizing how I have taken A/C for granted. We met our tour guide, got our bags and boxes, and started outside. Rucker told us not to let anyone help us with our bags as we exited the airport since we haven’t exchanged our money. People would be expecting a tip and if we didn’t give it there could be an argument. But as so many people came to help us with our bags that it was challenging to say “no.” We finally reached the hotel and it was like a little urban resort. I thought it was beautiful. Probably better in the daytime. And probably because I thought we would be really roughing it. I am very excited that we aren’t. I wasn’t expecting to see as many white people as I did. Probably missionaries or other study abroad groups. I’m not sure if it bothered me. I think it did but not so much in a bad way. Maybe in a disappointing way. I still have to think about it some more.

Ghana Trip: DAY ONE June 9th 2008

That afternoon a friend and I loaded the books from the book drive in her car to take to the airport. About six months ago, I thought of having a book drive for the students at The University Practice School in Winneba, Ghana. After hearing that their supplies were low and that most of their books had white characters and promoted Eurocentric values I felt that folks here could help out. I asked students and professors to donate books at the National Conference of Black Studies in Atlanta. I sent letters to numerous printing presses. I handed out, emailed and posted signs and baskets to collect books. The goal was to collect 500 books to fill the school's library. But they couldn't be any books. They had to be books with self-affirming images. Meaning they needed to be books focused on Black characters.

At first, only members of my cohort gave books. I had to fill the basket with some of Langston's books in hopes of getting more people to donate. Soon boxes and boxes of books came in from various publishers. People wrote checks. My mom collected book and money. People from other states said they received the email about the drive and mailed books. My sorors from home mailed books. One boy scout made it his service project after reading a sign a placed in the African American Community Extension Center and collected over 100 books. Classmates and old professors gave me money to buy books. My students in my recitation brought books (although I did offer it as extra credit up to 5 points (one point per book) some brought more books over the limit). After $1,070 in the donations we have 1,278 books and boxes of school supplies to add to the students' library! And my mom just called me to tell me that someone else gave her money for some books.

So, a week before we get to the airport, the books are boxed and each person is assigned a box to check as their second piece of luggage so that wouldn't have to pay for international shipping.

There are about 20 of us ready and excited to go to Ghana for 21 days. We get to the airport at 4:30pm with our flight leaving at 6:45pm.

However, for the anti-climax of the century, at 9:30pm, we find out that our flight is cancelled due to weather, and we wouldn't be able to fly out until Friday and it was Monday!

So, needless to say we were disappointed.

Some of us were angry...

Some of us just chillin' on the floor of the airport…

So Dr. Rucker worked his magic…

and are suppose to be leaving Thursday by bus to Detroit and then flying out to Ghana. We shall see what transpires...

Storybook Maybe’s

So, in my last entry I talked about how I was going to send an email to J just to clear the air. That was back in April. Last week I get an email from him with his phone number. I called him. My goal was for the conversation to simply discuss what I thought was my mis-management of our break-up and maybe catching up a little but ending it there and closing the chapter. But it end up being more than that. We talked for over 9 hours! And it would have been longer than that if I didn't have to catch a flight 1 hour before we stopped talking at 5:30am! It was a fun conversation. It was an interesting feeling talking to him. I was kind of giddy. I'm not sure why. Last time we talked (about a year or so ago) I felt more ambivalent with a twinge of anger, but still more ambivalent than anything. Then I get an email from him and I get this weird mixed-up cautious/happy/curious feeling? Anyway, I enjoyed the conversation. I think I may have enjoyed it too much. Without me mentioning our relationship, he talked about the various things he learned and realized over the past year or so. I then asked him did he know that all of those things affected our relationship. Then we talked about how all of his characteristics showed up in our interactions. He seemed to have grown so much. All the things that I had been trying to say to him over the past 8 years or so, he realized it recently. I think what made me enjoy out conversation "too much" was that before, I knew a relationship between the two of us wouldn't work out because he could be controlling, he thought he is right all the time, he tended to treat people like children, he wasn't very affectionate, he didn't express his feelings, didn't communicate etc. I didn't feel like he was ever intentionally mean, angry, distant, rude or anything like that, but it often times felt that way. He didn't think he did all of those things but now he does. Now that he does realize, he's working on it. That triggered a spark of hope in me. Maybe we could try this again? Maybe we both learned what we needed to learn and we could start over? But I think my heart propelled my mind too far forward. I don't think I like that I still have some left over feelings for him. Or maybe they aren't left over and they have been there all this time. They were just suppressed. I need to just pump the brakes a bit. Stop rehashing all of the storybook "maybe's" and go with the flow. It was just a conversation. We were just catching up; talking about what we learned and things we went through. That's it. I might need to tell myself that a few more times. I believe since I knew we couldn't work out because I didn't feel he could care for me the way I wanted/needed him to, I convinced myself to let him go. But I never did completely. It was as if I constructed a blockade that prevented any of the storybook hopes to enter into my mind. All I had to do is simply remind myself of the way I felt when we were together and know that if we did get back together I would just feel that way all over again. Now I feel like the blockade has been removed and all those relationship hopes are coming back because now he understands all that I had been trying to say.

So, the question is, how do I no longer concern myself with J? How do I stop thinking about what we could be? Well, the first thing is that we still don't live anywhere close to each other. He now lives in Montreal, Canada which is about 11 hours from Columbus. Neither one of us would want a long-distance relationship plus I don't plan on being in Columbus this time next year. Hopefully I will be Atlanta going to get my PhD, which means that we would be even further away from each other. Plus he said he was "kinda" dating someone but she is back in Florida or in his words "I guess we are still dating". I'm not sure how serious it is but I'm not going to be concerned with it. I'm just going to let things happen (or not happen) the way they may. He said I should go to Toronto for Carnival this summer which was something I wanted to do for the past few years. He said he should be there so maybe we will meet up, maybe we won't. I'm relaxing. I'm chilling out and going with the flow of life.