Escapist mode

Today I really feel like I’m in escapist mode. Escapism is a term in sociology that refers to a state of mind that allows one to “escape” from reality or current situation and into a fantasy world that doesn’t remind them or reference their current “real” state. For example, many say the news media is in escapist mode because we are in a war but the majority of the news topics are focusing on frivolous things like who is Anna Nicole Smith’s baby-daddy. Well my escapism is beginning to rear its ugly head because there are a lot of things that are about to come up and I have to get a lot done in a short amount of time and rather than dealing with it I’d rather go to a party, the movies or something other than what I need to do. I recently came to this conclusion today. I thought I was just tired but that isn’t the case only (because I am tired). What is it that is coming up you ask? Well, one of my thesis committee members wants me to have my literature review for my thesis done in two weeks. Now granted I had all quarter to do this but I JUST finish ALL the books he told me read and I have all of 1 ½ pages complete in a minimum 20 page paper. Next, I’m supposed to be going on the ski trip which should relieve some stress right? Well the travel company that is coordinating it is slightly boot-leg and unprofessional and I’ve been trying to straighten everything (as if I AM the travel company) so that all the people I asked to come and that are flying in from Florida, driving from Cincinnati, and DC will have a good time and won’t look at me like “this trip was slightly wack” and it wasn’t my fault but I will feel as if it is partially because I asked them to come. But even if everything goes well on the trip I have a final exam to take the day after the trip! I didn’t know this and couldn’t have known this before I agreed to go on the trip because I paid the non-refundable deposit before I even had the class I have now. So I have to bust my butt and study this week so I can be prepared once we drive back on the 6 hour trip. It doesn’t end there. The day of the test my cousin is flying in from Florida with my son. Now I want my so here and I asked her to bring him its just that my teacher decided to have the class presentation day the week after my cousin leaves my son here. Which means I have to either put this presentation before he gets here thus before the ski thus THIS WEEK along with studying for the exam. But in addition, I have been look for day cares for him when he gets here. Now this wasn’t as bad as it was the first time I did this but the daycare director was giving me a hard time about the times I need him to be there. I’m in a program in which the government helps with the cost of daycare and she said she won’t allow my son to come there unless he is there all day so it would be worth the trouble since the government will only pay like $.60 to $.40 on the dollar. I don’t want him in daycare all day so she said I could be there with him but he has to stay there all day. That’s a bit of an issue. Why? Because I can’t get anything done! Can’t work on my thesis cook or clean while he is asleep. But the only other option is for him to go part-time and I pay the regular price which is about $180 a week…yes I said a week and that is something I just can’t do. My professor said his daycare is like a second mortgage and he is right. Now, since my son is coming back up here I debated whether or not I should inform my son’s grandparents for his father’s side since they have been very nice to me and my son and wanted to see him. Now the fact that they want to see him isn’t the big deal it that the grandfather asked me how would I feel about my son’s father coming with the family. I told him I’d rather him not come but I said I would never say he couldn’t see his son so he is going to bring him. His father just brings such a negative atmosphere with him that I’d rather just not be around him and who knows what foolishness is going to come out of mouth that I have to hear.
But of course that isn’t all. My rent is going up at my apartment complex so I didn’t renew my lease. I found out about this program for single parents in which the state will help them may for housing is certain areas. Some of these areas are what some affectionately call “the projects”, some are decent housing and others are regular housing that simply accept the voucher from the state. I found out that one of these places is family housing on campus. I was very excited about that since all the other places were suspect at best. So I call campus a few months ago to find out if they had any openings. They said that they don’t have any two bedrooms but they do have a bunch of one-bedrooms so no big rush to sign up for one since so few people request one-bedrooms. I was thinking my son and I can make it in a one-bedroom. So I said I would sign up a little later since my lease didn’t end until the beginning of March. I then went across town to sign up for this voucher program. They said it is a 60-90 day waiting list but the lady said it maybe on 30 days for me, maybe since where I was asked to live wasn’t “the projects” which has a long waiting list. Well that was the beginning of January and its almost March and I’m still not even in the system to be place on the list to be given a voucher. I can’t renew my lease and just move when I get the voucher, because, ahh, I signed a lease! The only option was is to move in to the one-bedroom and pay full price until I get the voucher. So go I to sign up for housing on campus and they ask me if I have any dependants I say yes, they then say I can’t get a one bedroom for an adult and child people because its Ohio law, I have to get a two-bedroom. Well that wouldn’t be a big deal if the two-bedroom waiting list wasn’t 5 months long. So what to do. I have to move out of this apartment and into something in two weeks with my son. I could sneak and live in a one bedroom with my son and put myself on the waiting list for the two-bedroom and move when the two-bedroom in available and no one ever knows (FYI a little illegal …don’t know the repercussions). Or move into the one-bedroom send my son back to my mother get on the waiting list for the two-bedroom move into the two-bedroom fly back and get my son from my mother and have my voucher. That’s what it looks like I have to do. Oh yeah I forgot I have to find a date for all of my thesis committee members to meet with me so that I can tell them what I have done, what I am doing, and what I am going to do in regards to my thesis. There has yet to be a date that they all can met and doesn’t interfere with class. Another presentation to prepare. And I can’t foget that I told the middle school students that I was going to have a summer animation camp for them at the ACCAD center on campus which I must organize. I found funding which is the hardest and I have a basic agenda, I just need solid volunteers the help out. The good thing about this is that I don’t have to worry about this too much until spring quarter.
So let’s recap…
1) Final Exam
2) Final presentation
3) 20 pages literature review
4) Move from this apartment
5) Move into another apartment
6) Day care
7) Son coming
8) Ski trip
9) Thesis presentation

All to be done in about 2 weeks. It can be done. Its just all a little overwhelming at times… like right now when I have actually written it down. I’ll see how it pans out.